THINKING ABOUT LIFE

There are some things that many people fail to accept even in the 21 st century. Some people still cannot accept homosexual people. It is worse with parents because they end up disowning their own kids, their own flesh and blood. Such an act ends up hurting them (parents) in the process, though they do not realise at that particular moment. Most people still believe that homosexual people are either faking about who they are or are simply demon-possessed. Some people even hurl insults and show sings of disgust whenever they come across a homosexual person. During my youth days I had a gay friend, Sandziso. Well, I did not know about his sexuality at first, but I am happy now that I know. I met him at my 8 th grade. I was a newcomer and did not know anyone in the school. For the most times I was completely lonely at the school, with no one to talk to and share my lunch with for an entire week. After a week of loneliness, I saw a handsome and charming guy sitting in class, busy with hi

Why do we dream when sometimes our dreams do not come true? Is it because they are not worth it? Or maybe they are way too big to become a reality? I wonder what life is like because I have seen many people dreaming about a lot of things, but even today their dreams are being delayed or completely shuttered, while other people’s dreams come true just at the right time. Anyway, my daughter recently told me a story about a girl she always idolises, who always had a special dream. There was a little girl who stayed in an orphanage, named Emma. Her dream was to become the best and famous singer in the whole world. She started singing when she was very young such that those around her would make fun of her and mockingly call her “Beyoncé”. As the years progressed, so did her passion for music and stardom.   Emma would spend most of her time singing. She would sing while doing home chores, walking to school and when she was bathing. Before her evening prayers, she would start by singing. Mus

Happiness is sometimes determined by a person’s thinking style – and attitude. If one’s thinking as an individual is not matured enough to lead them into taking responsibility for their actions, particularly when they are wrong, then their whole life would be filled with hatred, grudges, regrets and bad temper. Consequently, they would never taste the fruits of happiness. Life is too short to be always bitter and sour. Many families have been destroyed because of some family members’ failure to admit to their wrongs. On the other hand, some friendships have ended because one betrayed the other and never apologised. Let me not even start with romantic relationships. It is true that sometimes we do and say crazy things to people, whether intentionally or unintentionally. As we are different people, with different attitudes and thinking styles, we handle certain situations differently. Even our reactions on certain things differ. It is always important to consider the feeling of the o

Not all words are meant to heal but some may destroy. It is good to always consider the way you speak and what you speak to people before you destroy another person’s life. Sometimes it is good to consider other people’s feelings and how they are going to adapt to certain words. Some people are driven to depression and anxiety and end up feeling useless because of certain words directed at them by other people. In extreme cases, some end up being murderers. Lucy and Paul met three years back on a school trip. She was doing her 10 th grade, while Paul was a manager in one of the biggest museums in the country. It was love at first sight. Paul did not hesitate to ask for Lucy’s contact numbers when he saw her. Even though she was in the middle of a crowd, Paul found a way to talk to her. Later that day, Paul started to communicate with Lucy through social media platforms. They communicated almost frequently, though sometimes they would spend two days without any chat. Being a mana

Growing up in poor rural area, where bullying was rife, was one of the most difficult things that were experienced by Sizwe in his life. Even though Sizwe and his siblings were raised by both parents, life at home was so miserable. Both of his parents were unemployed, so sometimes they would all sleep on empty stomachs. Most of their clothes were torn because their parents could not afford to buy them new ones. Sizwe was the eldest. Looking after his younger siblings was his responsibility. During break-time at school, Sizwe had to make sure that his younger siblings had eaten enough from the school kitchen or carried some food to last them until they came back the following  day to eat at school. Food at home was not something they had in abundance. Sizwe was generally known as a quiet person. He spent most of his spare time studying alone. Sometimes he would be at the back of their house at home and classes, sitting alone. Even though he was one of the brilliant students

“Wake up! Wake up! Today is a very special day for you, remember! Look how beautiful the day is outside. It shows that my beautiful lastborn daughter is getting married today!”Those were joyful words from my mother, very proud and shouting while opening the windows wide open. I could feel the early breeze hitting my face very softly which woke me up. It was a warm Saturday morning. I could feel that it was indeed a special day. People were already busy moving up and down outside on the yard. Some were singing while doing their respective chores, doing final touch-ups for the big day ahead. Others were getting  everything ready with their beautiful outfits. I could smell and see the smoke outside. Cooking of a large feast was in progress. I was so excited but nervous at the same time. I could not stop thinking silently about a lot of things that might happen. Wrong things. I could not stop asking myself so many questions: What if he doesn’t show up? What if someone stops

Fathers! What good have fathers done for this world that is worth celebrating? How should the children of the world see their fathers in this world filled with so many crises? So, here we are, today is Father’s Day, and we get to reflect once again. This is a day to recognize and honour fathers for the contribution they make towards the lives of their children. Here we talk about mineworkers, teachers, unemployed fathers, and all the fathers who make sacrifices to ensure that their children have a better life. They are often away from home, and this sometimes leads to people failing to understand their role in their children’s lives. Fathers remain the major providers of their families, especially from a financial aspect, but that does not come easily. Some, as workers, experience abuse from their bosses at their workplaces, while others work overtime to bring the best to their children. Others risk their lives to support their children and families. Although in most cases th

“Oh, you are such a heartless mother, so selfish and an ignorant woman, you are a murderer, you don’t deserve to be part of our family!” That was one of my husband’s aunts shouting, clicking her tongue and spitting towards me while I was passing-by being handcuffed and escorted by the police officer into the police car. My house has become a crime scene. Many people have surrounded the house, some gossiping, while others just stand outside silently, shaking their heads in disbelief every now and then. My husband’s body was carried out of the house by paramedics after they had confirmed his death. I could see my children from a distance crying while being held by my elder sister. “ What have I done ?”, I asked myself silently while crying and regretting it. My husband was a friendly person to many people. He would always lead community protests, speak about how important it is to fight against children and women abuse. He always made sure to present himself as a good man. But insi

It is half past four in the morning. I can tell it is early because I can hear the first train that is always leaving for the big city I wish to visit one day. The train is my alarm, it wakes me up so that I can go and search for the best spot to find food with just little begging. The night was long due to the cold rain. I feel so cold even now because my jacket has so many holes that bring in the cold, and is no longer helping me the way it used to. I guess it is time for me to go back and search for another one on the rubbish-bin, where most people dispose of their unwanted clothes. It was a special jacket, warm and always kept me warm through every winter cold. Every day is a miserable day for me because it is unpredictable on what I will face. Yesterday it was the worst day because a group of bullies invaded my space and took everything I worked for but today I am hoping for the best since I have to hustle either way. Life on the streets is not easy; we have to do wh

It all started as a flirt with a handsome man, Lihle, whom she believed was her future husband. They came from different tribes but that did not bother Sihle. They were workmates. Lihle was always her inspiration to go to work because she knew that she would see him. Although they were working in different departments, she always made sure that she would see him, sometimes making excuses for him to come to her office. She loved Lihle but could not tell him since she was still involved with her child’s father (Felix). Even though Felix was staying in another country, he was able to visit Sihle any time. Things between Felix and Sihle started taking a bad turn, but that didn’t bother Sihle much since she felt ready to make a move on Lihle. She did not even bother to beg Felix because she knew that she had someone she had wanted for some time. She started getting closer to Lihle, sometimes even saving his pictures on her phone. Sihle was in the Media department, so she would take pi

Based on my experience and what I have observed around people, I am still failing to get the answer to the question: CAN A MALE AND FEMALE BE FRIENDS WITHOUT SEXUAL BENEFITS? I have had male friends before, and also had a boyfriend who had female friends. So many things happened, yet I am still not sure whether it is possible, generally, for people to be friends with the opposite sex without any sexual benefits. I also don’t know whether it is inevitable that when two opposite sexes meet, any friendship they make will lead to a sexual relationship. During my school days, I had four male friends. I was the only female amongst them. We were called the “BIG FIVE”.   We were always together even outside school premises. We would eat lunch and walk together everywhere we were going – except the toilet, of course. We knew each other since childhood. We became more like siblings towards each other and they would call me their little sister, such that most people even believed that we we

An impoverished retired soccer player wishes he could turn back the hands of time. Another who retired too early because of drugs and alcohol wishes to play just one last season so that he could make a bit of money in order to, as he claims, start an investment. Then another, in his twenties, is not wanted by any soccer team. HOW IT ALL STARTS Alcohol has destroyed many people’s lives who let fame go to their heads. They used money and fame inappropriately. People who could have been successful soccer players, athletes, musicians, etc, are now left with their “almost-successful” stories to tell younger people in the taverns. When I was going up, in my community there was a group of very good soccer players. They were known as the group of winners because whenever they had a match, they often did not lose. When they were playing, the whole community would buy tickets to support them because they never disappointed. They had full support from both young and old. Their hard-wo

Everyone has a specific dream: a dream job, dream career, or other special dreams people see themselves achieving. Some dreams come true much sooner and when you least expect them, while some take more time to come true. Very few people live their dreams through inheritance, which they have received on a silver platter. Most people had to sweat and go through so much trouble to make their dreams come true. Their dreams required them to toughen up although it was not easy. They faced some tough challenges that seemed impossible for them to overcome, but they still strived to achieve their dreams. A few months back, I came across an online magazine called Calf Magazine . It is an online magazine owned by a young dedicated and hard-working woman. She details in one of the articles that during her high school years she faced so much hardship that led her into depression. Her dream was to become a make-up artist, and eventually she pursued her dream. With everything she went throu

Today we take the opportunity to celebrate and honour our beloved mothers. These are the people who showed us love, taught us respect and guided us through thin and thick. We also celebrate women who became mothers by default, taking care of their younger siblings. We also honour those women who mothered many other children though they were not their biological children. It is also important that as we are celebrating mothers, we also consider those fathers, especially single fathers, who play the motherly role in their children’s lives. Being a mother does not necessarily mean you have given birth only, but it is about giving everything you have for the children. It can be your biological children or fostered or adopted children, so long as you take the full responsibility of motherhood. It is true when they say that there is no love that can be greater than a mother’s love because mothers don’t give up easily on their children. Mothers sacrifice a lot for their children’s i

Life is like a journey, long and full of twists and turns. Not everything in your life will go according to the way you want and how you have planned it. Sometimes it can take a wrong turn when least expected. For instance, getting rejected is one of the most painful things that most people are encountering and has destroyed a lot of people’s lives. Some rejections may lead most people into depression. Some may have their lives change forever. What is more painful is that some rejections come from families, by those people you love. But that doesn’t mean you should end the journey of your life. Early this year, my university application was rejected by the university. It was not easy to accept. I felt that all my dreams and hard work had been for nothing. I couldn’t handle the rejection well. I was so depressed such that I even got sick. It was draining because I couldn’t stop thinking about my life and everything I had planned for my future. I felt like my life was over. All of

The saying that says, “don’t judge a book by its cover” is true. Few months back, I saw a group of school children walking, laughing and smiling on their way to school, which reminded me of my school days with my friend. Those were the best days ever. We were the happiest people everybody wished to be, which ended in tears within a short period of time. One late evening, just about to have dinner with my family, I received some very disturbing news which even today still shock me. My friend had committed suicide, hanged herself, specifically. I couldn’t believe it since the last time we were together was when we got back from school that same day. Everything seemed to be fine then. She never complained about anything nor showed any signs of sadness. None of us understood what happened, why it happened and, unfortunately, she wasn’t there to explain herself and everything that we wanted to know. It wasn’t late until one of her family members discovered her diary. In it she mos